Friday, October 10

The Texas Republican Party Platform for 2000 

Long Translation is followed by Short Translation.

Texas GOP Platform

The Party calls for the United States monetary system to be returned to the gold standard. Since the Federal Reserve System is a private corporation, has no reserves, and is not subject to taxation or audit, we call on Congress to abolish this institution and reassume its authority, enumerated by Article I, Section 8 of the United States Constitution, for the coinage of money.

Short Translation: The United States should return to the gold standard and abolish the Federal Reserve.

Congress should be urged to exercise its authority under Article III, Sections 1 and 2 of the United States Constitution, and should withhold appellate jurisdiction of the Supreme Court in such cases involving abortion, religious freedom, and all rights guaranteed under the Bill of Rights.

Short Translation: The Supreme Court should not be allowed to decide the constitutionality of laws regarding abortion, religion, or anything else related to the Bill of Rights. In these areas, Congress should be allowed to pass any laws it wishes.

Our Party pledges to do everything within its power to restore the original intent of the First Amendment of the United States and the concept of the separation of Church and State and dispel the myth of the separation of Church and State.

Short Translation: We should completely do away with separation of church and state.

The party opposes the decriminalization of sodomy. We publicly rebuke judges Chief Justice Murphy and John Anderson, who ruled that the 100 year-old Texas sodomy law is unconstitutional, and ask that all members of the Republican Party of Texas oppose their re-election.

Short Translation: Gay sex should be a criminal offense.

The Party affirms its support for a human life amendment to the Constitution and we endorse making clear that the Fourteenth Amendment’s protection applies to unborn children.

Short Translation: All abortion of all kinds should be permanently outlawed by constitutional amendment.

No homosexual or any individual convicted of child abuse or molestation should have the right to custody or adoption of a minor child, and that visitation with minor children by such persons should be limited to supervised periods.

Short Translation: Gays should be treated like child molesters and should not be allowed to visit children unsupervised.

The Party believes that scientific topics, such as the question of universe and life origins and environmental theories, should not be constrained to one opinion or viewpoint. We support the teaching equally of scientific strengths and weaknesses of all scientific theories--as Texas now requires (but has yet to enforce) in public school science course standards. We urge revising all environmental education standards to require this also. We support individual teachers’ right to teach creation science in Texas public schools.

Short Translation: The Biblical story of creation should be taught in science classes.

The Party supports an orderly transition to a system of private pensions based on the concept of individual retirement accounts, and gradually phasing out the Social Security tax.

Short Translation: Social Security should be abolished.

We urge that the IRS be abolished and the Sixteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution be repealed. A constitutional tax, collected and controlled by the States, must generate sufficient revenue for the legitimate tasks of the national government.

Short Translation: The federal income tax should be abolished.

The Party believes the minimum wage law should be repealed.

Short Translation: The federal minimum wage should be abolished.

We further support the abolition of federal agencies involved in activities not delegated to the federal government under the original intent of the Constitution including, but not limited to, the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms, the position of Surgeon General, the Environmental Protection Agency, the Departments of Energy, Housing and Urban Development, Health and Human Services, Education, Commerce and Labor.

Short Translation: The EPA, HUD, HHS, the Department of Education, and several other federal agencies should be eliminated. Since these departments supervise all federal welfare programs for the poor and sick, they are presumably advocating the complete abolishment of the federal welfare state.

The Party believes it is in the best interest of the citizens of the United States that we immediately rescind our membership in, as well as all financial and military contributions to, the United Nations.

Short Translation: Get the United States out of the UN.

The Party urges Congress to support HJR 77, the Panama and America Security Act, which declare the Carter-Torrijos Treaty null and void. We support re-establishing United States control over the Canal in order to retain our military bases in Panama, to preserve our right to transit through the Canal, and to prevent the establishment of Chinese missile bases in Panama.

Short Translation: Take back the Panama Canal. This plank remains in the 2002 platform. Since Panama presumably would object to this, they appear to be endorsing military action to retake the canal zone.

Any person filing as a Republican candidate for a public or Party office shall be provided a current copy of the Party platform at the time of filing. The candidate shall be asked to read and initial each page of the platform and sign a statement affirming he/she has read the entire platform.

Short Translation: We are dead serious about all this.

Now it's on to California, the most liberal state in the country!

[The author wishes to acknowledge calpundit for their long and short translations of the Texas GOP platform.]

  (0) comments

Thursday, October 9

Schwarzenegger’s Press Chief Hints Ban May Last: Intimates Left Papers Will Be Suppressed Permanently—He Warns Journalists 

New York Times

Date: Oct. 9, 2003

Headline: Schwarzenegger’s Press Chief Hints Ban May Last: Intimates Left Papers Will Be Suppressed Permanently—He Warns Journalists.

Los Angeles, Oct. 9, 2003 (AP) – A permanent ban on the entire California Democratic and Socialist press was intimated today by the chief of the government press department, Kenneth Lay, at a meeting of journalists summoned to hear an explanation of Governor Schwarzenegger’s emergency decree.

Thumping emphatically on a table Schwarzenegger warned journalists against transmitting news from “malignant sources” and chided “certain sections” of the press for allegedly minimizing the menace of democracy. In response to a question he said no censorship was planned against the press.

Regretting that the press seemed unsympathetic toward the new California regime, he continued.

“You must realize that what has happened in California is no ordinary change. A new period has set in and democratic times are past. In six months the world will think differently of the new regime. The new govnerment is here to stay.”

Concerning the domestic antigovenrment press, he said:

“We simply will not let the Democratic and Marxist press rise again. Systematic prosecution of all elements supporting democracy will be pursued.”

The very fact that the government adopted the emergency decree, Schwarzenegger said, indicated the extent of the menace of democracy.

That all the money now reaching California Democrats comes from France was the assertion of the Conservative movement’s press chief.

He said, “We have definite evidence of this fact,” but he declined to divulge the details.

  (0) comments

Wednesday, October 8

Watch Our Phrasing 

You ah all cot up in da Ahnald stowry. Ha ha ha. Oh, it hurts. "We muss wook toogetha!" Ha ha hah oh ho ho. Seriously, though, William... who told you about our plans for the Hollywood Bowl? We do not tolerate leaks of classified information, as everyone knows. Especially Valerie Plame. Who was, btw, working to stop rogue WMD, but hey.

Meanwhile, we keep evading. When asked if Scooter, Rove and the others released the name of a CIA operative illegally, we respond with a beautifully crafted phrase from our legal team: they had no involvement with "leaks of classified information" Look at our transcripts. That phrase comes up again and again. Even Talking Points Memo is bright enough to see this. Luckily, most of you say "oh, that must explain it" and you go back to sleep.

But you want Ahnald info. Fine. He's there to stop any investigations into Enron screwing with California, and get Bush elected in 2004. (In 2008, Jeb will beat Hillary. In 2012, Jeb will beat someone. In 2016, Jenna will simply move in. Don't worry, we have great plans in store).

He's going to help steal even more money from California by increasing spending, then he will blame it on the Democrats for being, hee hee, partisan. He'll be working behind the scenes, of course. On the election system. (Arianna Huffington said that he would be "very hands on.") He will ask Bush for a handjob and will get it. Ooops, I mean handout.

Finally, Echinops, you say you want a revolution? Um. Don't do that. Don't get the idea that there are way more of you than us. Don't think that with some creative organized effort you can take everything we have and lock us up or behead us or anything like that. Don't go thinking that the Constitution gives you that specific right. Don't think that with us out of the way, the world would be a much better place. Don't think that the majority of people are thinking just what you are thinking. Stay the damn course!

An American Revolution would be, uh, um, y'know... unpatriotic. Why do you hate America, anyway?

  (0) comments

Hotel California Incites Call To Arms 

Michael Rechtenwald of Citizens for Legitimate Government seems to have taken the CA recall affair to heart and he isn't taking it sitting down. Although his site was among the first to call the 2000 election result a coup, he's been content up-to-now to publish occasional articles and a bitingly sarcastic page of relevant daily headlines.

Not any more. Rechtenwald has had it. The gauntlet has been thrown and now it goes to the next level. He's written a new broadside, a call to action based on the Bill of Rights, and it contains the 'R' word. Yeah, that one. The one no one's used since the late 18th century. Read it here.

Things have changed.

The word? Revolution.

Now there's a bold new concept. If you believe in group mind, the next few years could get interesting.

  (0) comments

California Near To Martial Law; Drastic Schwarzenegger Decree Restricts Personal Freedom After Hollywood Bowl 

New York Times

Date: Oct. 8, 2003

Headline: California Near To Martial Law; Drastic Schwarzenegger Decree Restricts Personal Freedom After Hollywood Bowl

Los Angeles (U.P) – Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger has signed a decree completely disbanding all constitutional safeguards for freedom of the press, speech and assembly.

Postal and telegraphic privacy was abolished and the death penalty established for a long series of offenses, including assaults on the person of the Governor or members of the cabinet.

A spokesman announced the restrictions would last “until Democracy no longer is a menace to California.” They are a direct result of the fire which wrecked the main part of the Hollywood Bowl building.

The decree was entitled, “For the protection of the state and the people.”

Article 1 rescinds temporarily the constitutional guarantees of freedom, privacy and the inviolability of private property against confiscation.

Article 2 empowers the Arnoldmobile to take over federal states failing to safeguard public safety and order.

Extensive Plot Charged

The Cabinet met under the governorship of Governor Schwarzenegger and heard a report by Pete Wilson, Acting Minister of the Interior in California, charging the Democrats with an extensive plot of terrorism, arson and violence.

Police already had suppressed the Democratic and Social-Democratic press and arrested 130 Democrats and their sympathizers, including Gov. Gray Davis, Democratic whip in the Hollywood Bowl. Cruz Bustamante and Larry Flint, high Democratic leaders, had not been arrested. Police searched the houses of those arrested and seized documents.

The Hollywood Bowl fire evidently strengthened the determination of the Republicans to outlaw the Democratic Party—a measure which might yield them a majority in the coming Hollywood Bowl, thus paving the constitutional road to Schwarzenegger’s exclusive control of the administration.

The Schwarzenegger government ordered the arrest of every Democrat connected with the government, for alleged complicity in a terrorist plot which began with the attempt on the Hollywood Bowl buildings.

  (0) comments

Could They Really Have Elected This Slob? 

I'm shaking my head, but it looks like the Groping Nazi Tool has won the governorship of the state of California. I guess Enron, et al, will get a free ride now. Assuming this is not election fraud, I would have to say that I am going to find it hard to feel sorry for anyone if this goes badly, which, as you might have guessed, I'm sure will be the case.

Sad, sad...

  (0) comments

Tuesday, October 7

Election Techniques 

Silly Californians. We are going to win this state. Our operatives are already at work, discarding ballots, causing confusion and working for the triumphant handing of the state to Bush next year. That's the only reason we want this prick of a movie star in there. It's not that we like him. We're using him. He gets in, and we get California next year. That is the deal.

How do we influence you? Let me count the ways:

Phony supporters. You recall Florida? We paid people to go protest on our behalf. It's how we do things. We buy them. We don't have anyone in the Republican Party that would go hold a sign anywhere, but we know lots of unemployed people who will do anything for a dollar.

Phony Homemade Signs. We mass-produced signs for Arnold that looked like they were made by hand by individuals. Then we forced everyone at rallies to go through a metal detector, give us their signs, then pick up ours. Like our slogans? "Remarkable Women Join Arnold" and "Democratic Women Love Arnold."

Phony Outrage. Yes, we are outraged. Outraged that information about Arnold has been dug up and released in the final few months of the campaign. Outrageous, I say! Oh, what? The phony recall election financed by us just started in the last few months? Women that would have remained silent if he stuck to acting are actually concerned about their state's future? I'm outraged that you'd suggest that our outrage isn't outrageously on the level.

Phony Voting. We're using chads, absentee ballots (we love to mess with those), and touchscreen voting with no paper trails on machines that we can reprogram any way we want.

We've Always Got the Courts: They liked us a week or so ago when we asked that this flawed recall farce go forward, against their earlier ideas that working out the problems might be wise.


As for Syria, let's talk about Syria a bit. Let's talk a lot. Let's talk about it so much that you forget that you are investigating the White House for revealing the name of a CIA operative, a major crime. Peel back the labels ("senior official") they hide behind and we find that Andy Card basically ratted out Karl and Scooter, but we're going to pretend like that didn't happen, and go look for culprits in, oh, I dunno, Homeland Security. They have zillions of employees.

And yes, we love doing things with a bang. There is a certain beauty to massive destruction. It's almost easier and more effective than small hits. Big is beautiful. Inefficient, clumsy, powerful... thanks for the reminder. I'm going to go destroy someone.

  (0) comments

Monday, October 6


What a day! What a week last week! What a year! The Year of The Goat, which the Chinese warn is a disruptive year, turned out to be true.

The latest out of the Middle East is Israel attacked Syria. On "ABC This Morning with George Stephanopolis" asked George, "Did Israel give Washington a heads up before they bombed Syria?" Of all the ridiculous questions he could possibly have asked. But well scripted.

If Bush can't start a war on his own, he gets Israel to. Excellent. I'm surprised Czar NeoCon hasn't got something blogged on this yet.

Last night I was thinking about command and control centers (the military base kind). There's an exact name for them, but I forget. We've been involved in the war in Colombia around the time Bush took office. And then there's the dark war of the night, the one being waged by the CIA in Venezuela, which began sometime in the spring of 2002 (after Hugo Chavez pissed off the oil companies by raising the royalties they had to pay regardless of output). Poppy Bush didn't invade California for nothing. (Sorry, I meant to say Panama! California slipped out.) Remember the invasion of Panama in 1991? The U.S. military put in one of the military command centers (several perhaps) for the express purpose of future invasions by Southern Command of Colombia and Venezuela.

Anne Frank wrote, before she died in a concentration camp, that the Nazis destroyed all ideas that had existed prior to the war. The far Right-wing is no different in the way they have evolved ever since the beginning of the '50s when they began to slowly take power. When the Radical Right Wing Republicans toss out an idea, they don't just discard it, they obliterate it forever.

For example, the New Deal. Destroy it.

The Great Society. Smash it.

The use of radical Islamic Fundamentalists (people called "Freedom Fighters" by Ronald Reagan not so long ago) to fight a war against the Soviets in Afghanistan in 1981. Obliterate Afghanistan!! Destroy!! Smash, boom boom, invade the Middle East, colonize South Asia, eliminate the Bill of Rights, imprison Muslims forever.

Are you beginning to get the picture?

  (0) comments

Sunday, October 5

Their Days Are Numbered... 

Not to change the subject or anything, but aren't we all looking for clues by which we may evaluate our presidential candidates? Since I'm on the Dean team, I thought I'd take a closer look at what makes him tick -- using numerology. Ok, Howard Dean was born on 11/17/48. According to Florence Campbell, author of Your Days Are Numbered (1931), this is what to expect of people born on the 17th day of the month:

You are high-minded and proud-spirited, conservative by fits and starts, generous or penurious, collecting or scattering. You are very set in your ideas and seldom yield to others. You are one of the best banking and financial vibrations there is -- (1 + 7 = 8), and can conserve and manage the interests and affairs of others with great success. You should be the actual head of your own business, but should work with under-partners or associates. You execute what you undertake and should deal in large affairs -- taking care, however, that there is some one to attend to the details -- for you hate to be concerned with them. The final digit of this number (17) rules the earth and you will do well in any enterprise connected with it--such as lands, mines, oil or live stock. You have great love of knowledge and are fond of exploring. Any writing you do will incline to the technical and historical rather than to fiction. You want proof in spiritual matters.

Just for purposes of comparison, here's George W. Bush who was born 7/6/48, or the 6th day of the month:

Love is the keynote of your nature. You long for praise and appreciation and are made thoroughly unhappy by criticism. You want companionship and lavish your affection upon one "nearest and dearest" -- for the duration of the attachment, but, since the 6 is always searching for its ideal and seldom finds it, you like to try again and again, so are apt to earn for yourself the reputation of ficklesness. You love children but children of your own are not necessary to your happiness. You are well protected, but are in constant dread of the poorhouse. You are mental without being intellectual. You have fine powers of imitation and could succeed on the stage if your Life Path presented the opportunity; you could also do well in business and would find it an easy matter to acquire money or backing for your enterprises. You have literary and artistic tendencies and are not attracted to mechanics. You must have people around you and congenial surroundings.

  (0) comments

About that illegal leak... 

We all know it was a typical smear manuever eminating from the Vice President and pals. Look at the people who we've said it definitely isn't: Rove, Cheney, Scooter. Definitely not them, even if those pesky journalists say it was them.

So how do deflect ,more attention. Please turn to page 3 of "Diverting Investigations" and you will see this gem: If you can't beat it, join it.

That's right, if you know you are caught, one of your best bets is to delay. Buy yourself lots of time. People will get over the "shock" of the event, and if you play it right, will be bored to death and screaming for an end to the investigation.

So, step one is to embrace the investigation, and encourage it. In fact, expanding it is a great idea. Investigating the three guilty people will turn up too much damning evidence. You want to hide that evidence in an ocean of other materials. That's why we've expanded this investigation to include 2,000 people.

Don't you love it? Right here in the White House, we dream up an illegal smear and execute it flawlessly. We are guilty as guilty can be. It is as obvious as the nose on your face. We have motive. We have opportunity. But then we tell you it might be the fault of someone in the CIA or FBI, or maybe Wilson himself, or the Boston Red Sox, or maybe Malvo and the sniper defense team... who knows? We'd better get to the bottom of it, right? Ha! You'll get to the bottom of it. After we take the White House again next year.

So, if you ever get in trouble, deny your involvement, then insist that everyone you've ever heard of might also be guilty and needs to be included in the investigation.

And, boy, how many times do I have to say it? We've got our friend Ashcroft handling the investigation of ourselves. If for some reason we don't like what he does, we can always take it to Scalia.

Laws don't matter when you own the lawmakers, enforcers, interpreters, judges, and penalizers. You can erase that part of your brain responsible for morals.

Try going through one day without morals and see how it is. Park in handicap spaces. Don't pay tolls. Think like a mobster, planning hits on anyone that crosses you. Think in terms of destroying your fellow man, rather than helping them along. Steal things. Make plans to make everyone work for you.

Unless you try this and begin to understand how we think and act, we'll always have the upper hand. You don't think people live this way. We do.

  (0) comments

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?